Hiatus

Lately I've been feeling a little
lost
creatively.

I havent' really photographed much in a couple weeks.
I haven't crafted much of anything.
And my blogs have been
a little
lackluster.

I feel I'm Jackson Browne. 

That I'm running on empty.
(Runnin' on.....runnin'bliiiiiiiind. Runnin' into the sun but I'm runnin' behind...)

I might take a brief hiatus.
I'm not saying I won't post anymore,
just maybe not as often. 

I fear I've run out of interesting things to say.

But I'm open to suggestion.....

Cheers,
A

White Balance

After much urging from my friend Rebecca

I finally decided to pick up an expodisc.

I haven't been taking many photos of the girls lately.  

In large part because by the time we finally get home for the evening, it's dark out.

And I don't have a good flash. 

An expodisc allows me to set a custom white balance for my camera

based on the exact shooting/lighting conditions I am in.

Both of these photos were shot at the exact same aperture, ISO, and shutter speed.

Neither of them have been edited in any way.  The only difference is the white balance.

    auto white balance                                                                         custom white balance using expodisc

  
Ta Da!
Now I can take lowlight photos and not spend time in Photoshop
editing out the orange-yellow tones.

Thanks for the tip, Rebecca.
And Happy Birthday.
(Elena is singing it right now, in fact.)

Cheers,
A

P52: The View From Here

This weeks' theme for my Project 52
is "The View From Here."

I figured,
It wouldn't make sense for me to not take photos of my crafting.
There's always yarn stashed somewhere in the living room.

Quilt sqaures.
Pieces of thread.

Fabric.

My crafts are strewn about constantly.

That's my view.

I think it's a good one...

Cheers,
A

Work. In Progress.

Some things are easy.  Most are not.

I had a mental breakdown yesterday.  It involved tears. Pouting.  HandsUpInTheAirWhereDoIGoFromHere-ing. And some solid recognition.  I came to accept that if I want to become a full time photographer doing so is going to take a lot longer than I would like. Or, at least I'm trying to accept that.  It's a work in progress , really.  Like not eating the entire pint of ice cream in one sitting.

Right now, in this life, this moment, I don't have time to market myself.  I can't spend hours toiling over a design for business cards and although I bought my domain name, I don't know the first thing about a photography website.  I don't have the capacity to organize creative photo shoots and network with others in the wedding industry who work with the kind of client that fits my style of portraiture.  If I did have the serendipity to run into someone needing a photographer, I don't have business cards to hand out.  Or a website to direct potential clients to.

I don't have the time/money to attend workshops.  To learn.  Grow.  Explore my ability.

I don't have the money to buy the lenses I need.  The lighting accessories.  The computer.

But I want to. I wish I could.  More than anything.

So very badly.

My whole life I've dreamed of being an artist.  (Okay, okay, and a ballerina.  And a doctor.  And a teacher.  The other three didn't pan out.) But I never planned on becoming a photographer.  I fought against it for a while, actually.  When people would compliment my photos, I gave 110% of the credit to my Nikon.  It's still hard for me not to.  I'm sure part of it stems from my insecurities.  The feeling that by being so self-deprecating, it'll take the sting out of any other criticism that may come my way.

I am so inspired by the people who are living their dreams.  Who took the plunge.  No holds barred.  Jumped.  Anda.  Jasmine.  My newest stalkee Gladys.  I watch them, every day, as they continue to create amazing things, and I get jealous.  Insanely jealous.  Green-in-the-face-steam-coming-out-of-my-ears-lock-Cinderella-in-the-attic jealous.  In the most complimentary and friendly fashion, of course.  

I want to have the freedom to create art, every day.  To live my story.  To be my story.

The real truth I came to last night, as I sat in a teary wet heap on my kitchen floor, is that this is my story.  Every word of it.  Each and every step I take towards the achievement of my dream is worth taking.  No matter how small.  Even if I am sitting still, at least I am not moving backwards.

This will have to be my new mantra.  As I watch, from the sidelines, as these three amazing women take the 2011 wedding season by storm.  I'll practice whenever I can.  I'll still try and snag some new clients along the way.  And when 2012 gets here, and brings with it the end of the world, I will be ready to dive full force into my very own, my very first, official wedding season.  I hope 2011 brings me many more opportunities to practice.  To hone.  To grow.

And if you know someone who could use a photographer, please, in the name of all that is holy (and for the sake of keeping me off the kitchen floor) send them my direction.

Cheers,
A

PS:  I managed to build a photography blog.  You can find it here.  Bookmark it if you'd like.  Share it with friends.  It'd mean the world to me.

Wednesday Wisdom

It's Wednesday.
And this is what I know for sure.

Elena is the best hat model.
Ever.
Even when she's pouty.
Or non-cooperative.

Stella's eyes are the most beautiful shade of blue.

She's the "Blue" sheep of this family.
She has my grandpa's eyes, I think.
When she was an infant,
we would call her "Little Leonard"
because she looked just like him.

I still desperately want to cut my hair short.
Really short.
Michelle Williams short.
Lucinda cut hers yesterday.
Emma Watson short.
I am soooo jealous.

It looks amazing on her.

I am debating whether I want to upgrade my camera
(from a D90 to a D700)
or just spend the money on lenses.

I know I'll need both eventually,
and I'm torn with what to invest in FIRST.

My gut says camera body.
Lenses are easy to rent.

But I've gotten some feedback that recommends
I upgrade the lenses first.

I don't know what to do....

I went to Sephora today.
I bought grown up
big girl
adult
makeup.

And the girl who helped me
was amazing.
Helpful.
Friendly.
With a perfect smile.

(thanks!)

Stella has another ear infection.
I've gotten a cumulative total of 7.8 hours of sleep
in the last two nights.

I'm hoping the antibiotics kick in.
And sooooon.

I'm still amazed by what is happening in Wisconsin.
How people are standing up
for what they believe in.
Unfaltering.
With one voice.

I'm proud to be a 'Sconnie girl.

And now,
more than ever,
I wish I was a teacher.

We need more good ones.
But we especially need more great ones.
With loud, powerful voices.

Oh, and I hear they make over 100k/year.....

Cheers,
A

The Debate Rages On

Texas State Capitol: Photo Courtesy of DRL and his iPhone 3GS.

I'm from Wisconsin.
Wasn't born there,
but I grew up there.
Went to grade school there.
Graduated high school there.

There's a lot happening right now
in my home state.

A local pizza company shut down
regular delivery business
due to the large demand of orders
pouring in
from people all over the world
wanting to send food
to the protestors.

Pretty cool...
when you stop think about it.

I will keep my politics to myself,
but I will say that I am happy
that people who feel their government is doing them a disservice
an injustice
are standing up against it.

Are making sure their voices are heard.

Teaching us all
that we DO matter.
That we can affect change.

These hard working union and state employees
and those who want to stand alongside them
in support
solidarity
and unison,
are being
the change
they wish to see in the world.

If only we could all be so brave...

Cheers,
A